By Krucial Staffing

December 7, 2021

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Mental Health Resources: Combatting Stress Brought on by the Pandemic

This article was provided by Krucial Staffing.

This article was written by: Courtney Holmes.

The strain and stress this pandemic has put on healthcare workers is indescribable. COVID-19 created challenges healthcare workers had never faced before. At the same time, simultaneously overwhelming hospitals with patients who needed isolation at a speed many were not ready for. According to a poll done by the Washington Post in April 2021, six in 10 healthcare workers say the stress from the pandemic has harmed their mental health. If you feel like your mental health has been affected over the past two years, you are not alone. 

“Healthcare is, at its core, about improving the odds of life in its struggle against death. Of extending that game which we will all lose, each one of us unto eternity, extending it another year, month or second,” said Keith Olbermann, author, and commentator, during a special broadcast on MSNBC.  

Dealing with death has always been part of being a healthcare worker. All healthcare workers train on how to handle the post-modem process, but COVID-19 has redefined the death process. Healthcare workers have had to navigate the challenges that came with the pandemic, but the amount of death seen in such a short amount of time has greatly affected those who have been in the medical field for years, especially those who recently joined the field. 

As this pandemic has continued, images of patients in distress, dreams of perpetual alarms, goodbyes through an iPad, and repeated trauma have come home with many in the healthcare community. 

While the pandemic is not over, we wanted to build a list of resources to help with the stress many are facing and remind everyone; you are not alone. 

If you need to talk to someone immediately: 

If you are struggling with Seasonal Affective Depression:  

The Cleveland Clinic, known for its world-renowned research, has resources for working through the winter months: “Seasonal affective disorder (SAD) is depression that gets triggered by a change in seasons, usually when fall starts. This seasonal depression gets worse in the winter before ending in the spring. 

Some people may get a mild version of SAD known as the ‘winter blues.’ It’s normal to feel a little down during colder months. You may be stuck inside, and it gets dark early.” 

An organization called Better Help also offers counseling at a low cost, no matter your location. Better Help was started in 2013 to offer counseling over the phone anywhere at any time in any part of the country. According to Better Help, it has more than 24,000 licensed therapists with over 20,000 reviews. We recommend checking them out, no matter what type of mental health issue you are facing. 

If you are struggling with depression/burnout: 

The American Medical Association offers many resources to help healthcare workers, specifically with burnout and recovery from injuries while practicing physical and psychological medicine. AMA is directed towards healthcare professionals and examples they may experience working on the floor with patients.   

The American Psychiatry Association also breaks down how to handle stress and anxiety. They have produced information on how to combat depression on a day-to-day basis. Additionally, there is a page with commonly asked questions about depression if you are unsure where to begin your healing journey. 

If you are struggling with PTSD:  

The National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) has excellent resources for working through PTSD.  

According to the NIMH, “Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is a disorder that develops in some people who have experienced a shocking, scary or dangerous event.  

It is natural to feel afraid during and after a traumatic situation. Fear triggers many split-second changes in the body to help defend against danger or to avoid it. This fight-or-flight response is a typical reaction meant to protect a person from harm. Nearly everyone will experience a range of reactions after trauma, yet most people recover from initial symptoms naturally. Those who continue to experience problems may be diagnosed with PTSD. People who have PTSD may feel stressed or frightened, even when they are not in danger.”  

Additionally, Healthline has fantastic resources for working through PTSD, including resources such as Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy. EMDR is an interactive psychotherapy technique used to relieve psychological stress.  

There is not just one way to begin processing the effects of this pandemic. It is recommended to find what works for you and your situation. We at Krucial feel it is essential to encourage everyone who has worked tirelessly in this pandemic to take a moment to evaluate their mental health and reach out if needed.  

We recognize all the sacrifices that everyone in healthcare has made to help patients during this pandemic. It has taken an unimaginable toll on mental health for many healthcare workers. People left their families and lives to serve others and came home with battle scars. Your pain is noticed, your heroism is honored, and we encourage you to reach out for support. 

Interested in looking more about an emergency response or contract travel options? Check out emergency response and healthcare staffing company, Krucial Staffing.  Krucial Staffing specializes in high volume, rapid response staffing, driven by a mission to serve others at their greatest time of need. To learn more about what positions they currently have open, check out their Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, or Twitter page. 

Are you looking for your next travel nurse assignment? Click here to view our job board. Need housing for your assignment? Click here to search our housing page.

If you are a new travel nurse or looking into becoming a travel nurse:

Travel Nurse Guide: Step-by-Step (now offered in a PDF Downloadable version!)

By Fastaff Travel Nursing

November 29, 2021

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Mental Health Help For Travel Nurses

This article was provided by Fastaff.

The COVID-19 pandemic has had a major impact on mental health worldwide, but no one has been hit harder than front-line healthcare workers. As a result of the heightened stress healthcare professionals have endured for almost two years, they are at a higher risk for mental health issues like anxiety, depression, and post-traumatic stress. While traveling as a healthcare professional may feel isolating and lonely at times, it’s important to understand that you are not alone, and help is available and accessible through multiple channels.

Here are several benefits you can take advantage of as a travel nurse to support your mental health:

Employee Assistance Programs (EAPs)

Employee Assistance Programs (EAPs) offer professional assistance with personal, family, finance, and work struggles, often at no cost to the employee. Many programs offer free telehealth therapy sessions and in-person access to behavioral health professionals and substance abuse counselors, among a variety of other benefits.

The Fastaff Employee Assistance Program offers confidential telephone consultations and counseling sessions for issues including stress, depression, family and relationship concerns, and more.

Movement is Medicine

According to the Anxiety & Depression Association of America (ADAA.org), even just five minutes of aerobic exercise can help lower cortisol, one of the primary hormones responsible for elevated levels of stress in the body. Utilizing fitness programs offered by your agency will encourage you to get moving and may improve your mental health and emotional wellbeing.

Fastaff currently works with United Healthcare to offer travelers enrolled in a Fastaff Health Plan a discounted digital fitness membership for 24/7 access to Peloton fitness classes on the go. Fastaff nurses can also join a free virtual yoga class every Wednesday at 12pm MT.

Prefer to get out of your house or hotel room to exercise? Fastaff also offers its travelers discounted memberships to 24-Hour Fitness – the world’s largest privately-owned fitness center chain that has thousands of convenient locations, the latest equipment, and diverse fitness classes to keep your workout interesting.

Finally, If you are currently enrolled in a Fastaff Health Plan, you may be eligible to enroll in a 1-year subscription to Apple Fitness+ at no additional cost.

In addition to taking advantage of programs that your agency may offer, one of the most underestimated forms of exercise that boosts both your physical and mental health exists for free – a short walk outside can help center and calm your mind and body, leaving you refreshed and renewed, allowing you to show up as the best healthcare professional you can be. Check out mental wellness apps like Calm and Headspace for guided meditations, encouragement, and coaching while you’re out and about.

Talk it Through and Work it Out

Talk therapy is a proven safe and effective method to help individuals sort through what’s taking up space in their minds and body. Talkspace is an online application that provides ongoing support and resources from a wide network of licensed therapists. With a dedicated COVID-19 Instagram channel and therapist-led Facebook groups, Talkspace offers discounted subscriptions for all users and financial assistance for healthcare workers and first responders.

In addition to therapy, The National Alliance on Mental Illness (nami.org) offers resources dedicated to healthcare workers who have been impacted by the events of the last year and a half. NAMI offers multiple resources to connect health care professionals with licensed mental health professionals at no cost, in addition to resources for individual and group support. 

Long before the COVID-19 pandemic, healthcare professionals experienced an unprecedented amount of burnout, depression, workplace stress, and anxiety. As the pandemic continues to exacerbate the rate of mental health issues in nurses, there must be a paradigm shift from mental health crisis reaction to prevention and awareness. Our goal is to empower our nurses to be proactive about their mental health by destigmatizing mental illness and providing ongoing support and resources as they navigate the COVID-19 landscape.

Our healthcare heroes are our lifeline, and we are here to support you every step of the way. Take care of yourself and be well.

Crisis Resources

  • Crisis Text Line – Text HOME to 741741 to reach a Crisis Counselor
  • National Suicide Prevention Hotline – 800-273-8255
  • NAMI HelpLine – 1-800-950-6264 or info@nami.org

We hope you found this article on mental health help for travel nurses helpful. Have you found ways to help with your mental health while on assignment? Comment them below.

Are you looking for your next travel nurse assignment? Click here to view our job board. Have the assignment but need housing? Click here to search our housing page.

If you are a new travel nurse or looking into becoming a travel nurse:

Travel Nurse Guide: Step-by-Step (now offered in a PDF Downloadable version!)

By Kevin Devoto

November 10, 2021

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How to Stay Calm and Content as a Travel Nurse

Nurses have a lot of stress on their plates daily. Adding frequent travel to an already anxiety-provoking job can make it that much more stressful. As a travel nurse, you’re not in one location for very long, and you’re in some longer than others. This means you probably feel like you’re constantly learning your way around new cities and learning the ropes at different facilities. There are many great perks to being a travel nurse. However, some of the reasons that may have initially led you to this type of nursing could be the very aspects stressing you now. Here are some ways to stay calm and content as a travel nurse

Staying Calm and Content:

Make Time For Self-Care

Everyone experiences stress at times, particularly those in the helping professions. It’s essential to take some time for yourself to relax. Routinely practice de-stressing. You may even have to schedule it into your daily and weekly activities so that you’re sure to make time for it. As a nurse, it’s vital to your own health to do something you enjoy every day, even if it’s just soaking in a hot bubble bath for an hour. Making time to de-stress, especially after a particularly challenging day, will improve your mental and physical health. You need to be healthy to do your best job helping others, so be kind to yourself; it’s not selfish.

Get enough good sleep and eat healthily. Considering features like mattress thickness, you may need to invest in a more comfortable bed to get a better night’s sleep. Make sure that you’re getting a solid eight hours of sleep each night. Technology these days allows much more access than ever to your friends and family. Wherever you are in the world, you can keep in touch with your loved ones, calling or video chatting. While it’s not perfect, knowing you have supportive people at your fingertips can keep homesickness at bay. 

Invest In Yourself

Spend a little extra on the things you need for your job, such as clothing and especially your shoes, since you’re going to be on your feet for long hours. You need to be comfortable while you do your job. You also need to be sure that your gear will hold up through the wear and tear of your demanding work. Be sure to invest in equipment that’s more aesthetically appealing to you, also. After all, you perform at your best when you feel good and look good. 

Look For New Adventures

Working in different cities can be stressful as you’re learning where everything is and how to navigate the area. The change of environment can also be exciting. Take time to explore the region. Your co-workers and neighbors can offer ideas of things you must do while you’re in the area. Additionally, exploring can allow you opportunities to meet new local friends. 

Learn Organizational Skills

Life is much easier when you can stay organized, but this is challenging for many people. When you’re moving regularly and on the go with your daily duties, being organized is essential to save your life as free from stress as possible.

Keep Yourself In a Routine

Your assignments as a travel nurse could vary widely. It can be challenging to keep yourself in a routine when you feel like you’re constantly doing something different. If you can create a pattern and stick with it, stress will be kept at a minimum. You’ll know what to expect and will feel more in control over your life. It’ll also create a sense of normalcy. 

Conclusion

As a travel nurse, you are particularly susceptible to stress. It’s crucial for your mental and physical wellbeing that you take care of yourself first and foremost. You won’t be helpful to anyone if you get burned out. Find ways to make yourself comfortable in your new surroundings and be kind to yourself daily. As a travel nurse, you have a lot of responsibilities, but you also have a lot of opportunities others don’t, so enjoy them. 

We hope you found these tips for staying calm and content as a travel nurse helpful. Have you found any ways to keep yourself calm as a travel nurse? Comment them below.

Are you looking for your next travel nurse assignment? Click here to view our job board. Do you have an assignment lined up but need housing? Click here to search our housing page.

If you are a new travel nurse or looking into becoming a travel nurse:

Travel Nurse Guide: Step-by-Step (now offered in a PDF Downloadable version!)

By Morgan Elliott

September 5, 2021

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5 Relaxing Activities for Travel Nurses that Are Beneficial for Physical and Mental Health

Being a traveling nurse, although fun and fulfilling, can sometimes become a tad bit overwhelming. With everything that comes with this type of job, one can easily become stressed and forget about their own needs.

This, of course, will only be counter-productive in the long run. The more physically and emotionally fit you are, the better you will be at performing your job. Taking care of your well-being first will enable you to be better at taking care of others. That’s why we’ve created a list of 5 relaxing activities every traveling nurse should try out.

Running helps keep you in shape

Relaxing Activities

Running is an excellent form of exercise that will help you stay in good shape and improve your health. This type of exercise is suited for people of all ages and fitness levels. When going for a run, many people use the opportunity to clear their heads of any thoughts and focus solely on running itself. On the other hand, to some, going for a run presents the perfect opportunity to think about things that are currently happening in their lives and come up with ways to deal with them. Of course, if you’re just starting to run, make sure you take things slow. Get all the necessary running gear that will aid you to perform this workout correctly and minimize any chances of injury.

Hiking is an excellent way to relax and unwind

If running is not your thing, you should try hiking instead. As a beginner hiker, you won’t have to get any elaborate gear and have any significant expertise. You can simply go for a hike and enjoy some fresh air and beautiful sceneries. If you end up liking it and you feel like you want to learn more about it, check out a useful guide on hiking to find out more information about this fun activity. So, get your hiking shoes on, make sure you bring some water to stay hydrated, prepare your favorite playlist and go on a relaxing and mindful hike.

Yoga will heal your soul

Relaxing Activities

Yoga is another way you can take care of both your mind and body. The fact that you can practice yoga wherever you want is an added benefit to this exercise. No matter if you decide to go to a yoga studio, or you choose to do it in your home/out in the park, you’ll surely start noticing the benefits soon. Besides, since in order to practice yoga you won’t have to get any special gear, it makes a perfect exercise option for traveling nurses. Therefore, make sure you find a peaceful corner for yourself, get your comfortable exercising clothes on and get in tune with yourself.

Going to a concert will boost your happiness

It’s true what they say, music can – in fact – heal your soul. So, if you hear about any interesting concerts near you, don’t hesitate to check them out. Not only will listening to your favorite jams boost your endorphin levels but singing along will bring some additional benefits. When you sing, you use your lungs more. Therefore, it’s safe to say that singing is a great type of exercise for this very important organ. When you get the chance to combine something you enjoy with something that’s good for you, never miss on doing it.

A “me” day will re-energize you

relaxing activities

In the end, we should all try to be more kind to ourselves. Many people – and nurses in particular – tend to always put others before themselves. However, it is of the utmost importance that we pay attention to ourselves from time to time and put our own needs first. That’s why you shouldn’t shy away from taking a “me” day every once in a while, and treat yourself both physically and emotionally. Go for a relaxing massage or prepare yourself a nice warm bubble bath. Do things that bring you joy or even go to therapy if you start feeling overwhelmed. As a medical professional, you know best just how important it is not to ignore the signs our bodies are sending us.

A job of a traveling nurse is anything but easy – both physically and emotionally. That’s why you should make sure that you treat both your body and mind to some relaxing activities and things that bring you joy. The better you feel, the more productive and engaging you’ll be, which is certainly something both you and the people around you can greatly benefit from.

We hope that you found these relaxing activities for travel nurses helpful. Do you have any activities you use to help relax after a hard shift or on your day off? Comment them below.

Finished the travel nursing guide and are ready to look for an assignment?

Check out our travel nurse jobs!

By AMN Healthcare

July 8, 2021

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How To Leave A Stressful Nursing Shift Behind

This article was provided by AMN Healthcare.

Perhaps now more than ever, whether you’re a travel nurse or a perm nurse, you’ve been stressed during and after a nursing shift. Everyone has those days when you can’t seem to stop for a bite to eat or even a bathroom break. Nursing stress is common and can easily lead to nurse burnout, but with these easy stress management tips, you will be feeling recharged in no time.

Tips for leaving a stressful nursing shift behind:

1. Unplug and relax

A quiet routine can quickly soothe your ruffled soul. Follow these tips to help you relax and unplug after a stressful nursing shift:

  • Pull out those homey touches you’ve brought with you, such as lavender-scented candles, eucalyptus bath salts, and your favorite robe and fuzzy socks.
  • Take a bubble bath, have a glass of wine, and binge on your favorite TV show.
  • Reward yourself with a delicious, light meal (chicken soup, salmon, salad, sushi), followed by a piece of dark chocolate as a healthy antioxidant reward.
  • Wind down with some deep breathing, meditation or yoga stretches, then unplug your electrical devices and get a good night’s sleep.

2. Soothe your aching hands, feet, neck, and back

Instead of popping a pain pill for your aching feet and joints, why not treat yourself to a rejuvenating massage or other treatment?

  • Professional massages often include aromatherapy, essential oils, a warm massage table, soft lighting, instrumental music, and gentle hands that can relax and restore your well-being. Get discounts and coupons via the local paper, Yelp, Groupon, or colleagues in the know.
  • Hot tubs, warm baths, or foot soaks with Epsom salts can be just the ticket for many nurses.
  • Stretching, swimming laps, yoga, and Pilates help, too. Turn to YouTube exercise videos for inspiration or a favorite low-impact exercise DVD.
  • Other pain relief can come from chiropractic treatment, acupuncture, physical therapy, and TENs stimulation.

3. Spa treatments — just for you, or with friends

Spend a half-day at a local spa for the ultimate stress relief after a stressful nursing shift. Just imagine yourself changing into a comfy robe, sipping cucumber lemon water, nibbling fresh fruit, and being queen or king for the day! Choose from various spa treatments, from mud baths and refreshing wraps to foot reflexology, massage, and revitalizing facials. Some spas offer exercise classes and healthy lunches. Day spas offer a great way to spend time with new friends, including other travel nurses and staff. Check the local hotels and medical spas for the best deals, and prepare to be pampered.

4. Think positive and laugh

Some reports say that kids laugh more than 300 times a day, shouldn’t they? The Mayo Clinic confirms that laughter boosts endorphins and relieves stress, among other physical benefits.

  • Go ahead and giggle over those funny cat and dog videos that everyone shares or other Animal Planet-type spots.
  • Browse through the funny greeting cards and read all the snarky Maxine jokes. It’s okay to chortle in the aisles.
  • When you or someone at work is grumpy, add a quarter to the “happy hour” jar for get-togethers.
  • Call, Skype, or Facetime your best friend and guffaw about your day, or reminisce about that last trip to Vegas.
  • Keep a gratitude journal and jot down what made you happy that day.

5. Find a relaxing escape

Travel nursing is essentially a working vacation, which means 1,001 places to discover during your time off. Ziplines, water parks, biking trails, zoofaris, and beaches perfect for strolling can reduce stress and replace nagging worries with memorable new adventures. Check out the local food and music festivals in your assignment city, visit a historical town nearby or take up a sport you always meant to learn. Or stretch your limits and try white water rafting, parasailing or skiing; the adrenaline will make you forget your woes!

When you’re on a nursing assignment, it’s easy to find ways to unwind and reduce your stress between nursing shifts. Don’t let nursing stress overwhelm you! Pamper yourself or explore new horizons. You’re worth it!

As a travel nurse your mental health can take a toll. Long and stressful nursing shifts, stressful patients and families, the list goes on. Click here for more articles on mental health and mental health tips.

If you are a new travel nurse or looking into becoming a travel nurse:

Travel Nurse Guide: Step-by-Step (now offered in a PDF Downloadable version!)

By Victoria Casto

June 16, 2021

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Taking Care of Your Mental Health as a Traveling Nurse

As healthcare workers, we take care of others all day long.  We chose this career path because we enjoy making other people happy and are generally compassionate individuals. However, we often neglect our own mental health in the process, and we can’t take care of our patients if we don’t care for ourselves first. Nursing is already a very challenging job that demands long hours under high-stress levels.  Then throw a global pandemic into the mix, and you’ll find many people have been pushed to their breaking points.

This year has been especially trying in the healthcare field, but nurses, in particular, have gained even more responsibility and tend to run the circus. Below you will find mental health tips for travel nurses and healthcare workers.

Burnout is Real

I’ve seen an overwhelming number of nurses on social media expressing burnout and even wishing to leave the field entirely after the coronavirus pandemic hit. For me, it felt like my whole life was uprooted at work, and I was under constant unknowns and ever-changing policies about how to deal with something we knew very little about. On top of all that, we had to live in mostly isolated conditions at home without the usual contact from friends and loved ones.

Nursing school could never have adequately prepared us for something like this or the extreme level of burnout that we felt.

Recognizing There is a Problem

The first step is awareness that something needs to change. Sometimes it takes hitting some real lows to learn how to pick yourself back up and grow from it.  Most people wouldn’t know it today, but when I was 16, I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression. I’ve had to learn how to take care of my mental health over this last decade and a half, and I’ve truly been on a journey in life to find happiness and peace within myself. So in a way, I was a little ahead of the game with recognizing when I’m under stress and was already prepared with coping strategies during tough situations.

It Takes Work

You’ve got to find what makes you happy. For me, exercise, fun outdoor activities, yoga, and creative outlets like cooking, writing, and photography are things I do for myself.  These are things that bring me joy and excitement and help me find peace at the end of the day. I’ve also found that one of the most important things I need in life is balance.  I tend to stay very busy and am usually out exploring on my days off, but that can eventually leave me feeling stretched thin. During those weeks where work kicks my butt, I sometimes have to take a day to focus on self-care and relax so I can recharge and find that balance.  Hello, mental health days!

A daily gratitude practice is also a small activity that can make a big impact on your mindset.  It’s amazing how reflecting on all the positive things you have in your life can make the other problems seem so small.

Take Advantage of Being a Travel Nurse

When I first started travel nursing, I felt like a huge weight was lifted off of my shoulders, not having to be so involved in unit politics and feeling trapped in a job.  While on contract, if we find ourselves in a work environment we don’t love, we can leave in just three months, and it seems like there is always light at the end of the tunnel.  We also get to choose where we work, including an endless number of beautiful places to immerse ourselves in!  I love the outdoors, and some of my favorite ways to unwind are going out for a hike in the mountains or even just lying on a beach. 

Travel nursing has brought me to so many amazing places that seem unreal and have absolutely taken my breath away.  I’m so grateful every day for the life I get to live. And one of the simplest ways to deal with burnout is taking some time off in between your contracts to recharge!  I usually take off at least a month between jobs to catch up with family and take a trip somewhere fun.  Plus, you never have to feel like you’re alone in a new city!  I have always found that other travel nurses make the best friends because they perfectly understand your crazy lifestyle and are down to get out and explore with you.

Knowing Your Limits

But if you ever find yourself in a tough place that doesn’t seem to have light at the end, there is always help and know that you are not alone. Most employers offer at least a few free counseling sessions at no cost to you under an EAP (employee assistance program).  I’ve seen a counselor in the past and know several people who have counselors (including traveling nurses). Nami.org has some great resources as well, or feel free to reach out if you need someone to talk to.

At the end of the day, we have to look out for ourselves and keep our minds and bodies healthy.  That way, we can take care of our patients to the fullest and provide them the care they need and deserve.

We hope you found these mental health tips for travel nurses and healthcare workers helpful. Have you found any mental health tips that have worked for you? Comment them below. If you would like more information on mental health click here.

If you are a new travel nurse or looking into becoming a travel nurse:

Travel Nurse Guide: Step-by-Step (now offered in a PDF Downloadable version!)

By Krista Berge

May 29, 2021

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TGN Presents: Mental Health Awareness with Krista Berge

As a part of mental health awareness month, we want to help travel nurses, and healthcare workers learn to take their mental health seriously especially with the certain circumstances this past year has brought us. Depression and suicide rates have increased drastically this year alone.

To help bring awareness, Krista Berge recently went live on our Facebook group and website to share the story of her husband’s struggle with depression and ultimately taking his own life.

About Krista:

Krista graduated from Florida Southwestern State College with a degree in Nursing and is currently an RN. Helping others is her passion, and before taking some time off this past year, she taught in the community about health and wellness. Krista is also a mother to four beautiful children Boston, Lincoln, Brinklee, and Storie Belle. They seem to take up a lot of her time with their sports and loaded social calendars. Still, when she finds a moment, Krista enjoys reading, eating an obscene amount of Mexican food, and taking little adventures around the Southwest Florida area. We can all help prevent suicide. The Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals at 1-800-273-8255.

You are not alone in this fight! And remember, If you’re struggling with suicidal thoughts…please reach out to someone, anyone.

And make sure you STAY.

YOU, my dear, matter.

Krista has been a regular contributor for The Gypsy Nurse. If you would like to read more about her, her family’s story or watch her previous live event click here.

By Krista Berge

May 22, 2021

10415 Views

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It’s Time for You to See What Death by Suicide Leaves Behind. A Story of a Widow’s Fight to Survive.

I have to be honest with you…I am struggling to write this. I am scared to let you in on this secret. Worried about my kids eventually reading these words. I am sad about the insight you are about to get inside my head. I am fearing how you’ll start to look at me with pity in your eyes.

I am scared to not speak up

But more than that, I’m scared to not speak up. I am worried that you’ll continue to feel alone. I’m nervous you will think that you’re the only one. I am terrified you will think mental illness looks one way when in reality it looks another. Since I have been comforted in my afflictions, I have no choice but to try and comfort you in yours. Or at the very least, be honest.

It’s time for you to see what death by suicide leaves behind

The fear of you REALLY seeing me is worth every breath I have fought and am still fighting to take. It’s time for you to see what death by suicide leaves behind. A shell of grief. A body filled with wrenching and insurmountable pain. A therapy bill a mile long. A medical record with words like “PTSD” and “Complicated Grieving Process”. It is time for you to see that mental illness can look “put together” and “calm”.

Are you ready for the truth?

After living through my husband’s death, I struggle deeply with my own mental health. And mostly I mean not just ‘down days’ or ‘situational depression’. I have had suicidal thoughts and have struggled on and off for over a year now. Yes, even after watching my kids’ faces as their dad lay in an open casket. I have longed at times to be in that casket with him. I have prayed for death and even fantasized how peaceful it would be to finally rest.

The darkness creeps in at the most unexpected times too. Times when I think I am doing better, when the new medication is working or when I think I don’t need it. When therapy is going like clockwork. Times when the pipe dream of ever feeling better is at an all-time high. And it hits.

The darkness.

Like a heavy blanket enveloping my whole body. Once again, I cannot see the light through the encroaching fibers. Breathing becomes more difficult as my mouth is covered, and I can’t ask for help. My heart only feels guilt. The what-ifs drown me, and I no longer want to struggle to stay afloat.

My brain tells me this will not work.

Any of it. Living without Brian. Supporting four kids on my own. That the only way to make the pain stop is to make my heart stop. My dark thoughts tell me I am making things worse. That I wish I were never even born. My despair tells me that things are never going to get better. That this is not working. Not only is it not working, but it is unsustainable and will never work. So, what’s the point?

The darkness is so heavy that I do not want to scare you. So, I lie. It is not your fault though. It is my choice to hide what is going on. Something about keeping it from you makes me feel like I am keeping it from myself too. I am scared that if I tell you what is really happening inside my head, nothing can ever go back for either of us. Even the fear of admitting I am struggling to the brink of death will wind me up in an institution.

So, I sit in the dark.

That is the thing about darkness though, you think you can see. Have you ever sat in the darkness for so long that your eyes begin to adjust? You start to see shapes. Monsters that are not even there. The darkness can start to feel like that is all there is. You soon forget a world with light. The bright spots seem like a dream. I cannot remember life before the darkness in those times.

But in those moments of life and death, I look in my hands and see I have actually been handed a match. I have been holding it, rolling it between my worn fingers, debating about whether to even light it this entire time. You see, if I light the match, you will see me. My lying eyes, my faltering smile, my unassuming laughter, and airy personality are all just a costume I zip on.

So here I am. Lighting the match.

Letting the light show me…letting the light show you…what mental illness really looks like. What life after suicide leaves behind. How completely terrified I am that picked up where Brian left off.

But why does that have to be a bad thing?

Really, hear me out. To live on both sides of suicide is why I need to tell you the truth. It is neither selfish or weak. It literally feels like the ONLY answer. I know because I have felt it. I can understand why Brian is not here anymore but at the same time, I can’t. It is living in my own personal hell while thankful there is a heaven above me. I can tell you without a doubt that if Brian were still here, he would be shedding as much light as he could on this growing epidemic.

Lighting this match

Showing you my heart, my head, my face, is the only way. But not only are you seeing me, but I am also seeing you. I am seeing my family and friends too who have patiently been waiting for the darkness to subside the entire time. Seeing my doctors and therapists who never made me feel ashamed. I am seeing people that love me take down every brick I tried to put up as a wall. So now you see my broken and tattered mind while I see your heart for me that has been there the entire time. The light may show you my brokenness, but it shows me your goodness as well.

I need you to know that you are not alone. I need to show you that you can smile and still feel like dying on the inside. You are not “crazy” and two opposing feelings can exist. That you are NOT your negative thoughts. You are not weak by asking for help. You are not alone in the darkness. I promise you to have an entire army waiting for you. Just because you cannot see them, doesn’t mean they’re not there. That you too can light the match. Ask for help. Cry for help. Scream until someone comes running. But please, do not sit there in the abyss of darkness. It is lying to you.

I can no longer sit quietly in the dark anymore. Letting it engross me. Stealing my life as it stole Brian’s. I will light this match until it burns my fingers. Until the pain sears through my body and then I will light another one. And another one. And another one. You are not your suicidal thoughts and it is never the answer.

Please reach out for help

Please, if you are struggling with your mental health and/or suicidal thoughts, please reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or text HELLO to 741741

To read more about Krista’s story click here are a couple more articles from her.

By Janet Warton

May 15, 2021

6701 Views

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Why You Should Prioritize Your Mental Health During the Pandemic

The recent situation in the world has seen unprecedented levels of worry and fear spread amongst people, fearful for their health and for their future.

Exact Impact?

The exact impact of the situation is still unclear; will we recover economically? What will the so-called ‘new normal’ look like in real terms, in malls and workplaces across the US? How will we truly get back to normal if there is such a thing?

These are huge questions and, whilst many people remain either confined to their home or at limited capacity for living their lives, they are given far too much time to contemplate the answers. That, in turn, could lead to a new problem across the US, in the form of a mental health epidemic.

In recent years, awareness of mental health issues has risen considerably, with celebrities such as Chris Evans able to open up about their struggles and help those who fight demons on a daily basis. The importance of mental health is even being taught at the university level. Case in point, Maryville University notes how those with a psychology degree are taught the links between sound mental health and learning success, which showcases just how important it is to stay in shape mentally.

mental health
Credit – Pexels / Polina Zimmerman

In other words, an individual’s ability to learn and develop is severely impacted by any issue around their mental health. That is why, during these testing times, it is vitally important to keep on top of your own mental wellbeing and your ability to cope with the constantly changing outside world.

The current situation has seen a severe increase in the potential triggers for an individual’s stress and that can result in a vicious circle. In their article ‘Problems Cause Stress and Stress Causes Problems’, My Secure Advantage examined how psychological worries can eventually turn into physical problems such as stomach cramps; the same can be said for mental health. The problem produces stress, the stress produces a problem, and it the problem becomes cyclical. Placing yourself in harm’s way by worrying and being anxious not only affects how you think and act but can lead to pain and other physical symptoms.

Physical manifestations of mental health issues are one aspect to be concerned about, but another key issue is the potential for mental health sufferers to go beyond anxiety and worry and become a suicide risk. It is one of the biggest killers of young people around the world and although Ohio State University showed mental health visits can reduce the risk of suicides, the recent situation has made face to face communication much harder, further increasing the risk. This is another firm reason why it is important to look after your mental health as much as feasibly possible during the pandemic.

Steps to keep your self focused

There are some basic steps you can take to help keep yourself focused and able to cope mentally. The first is to ensure you have a routine, something that brings structure to your day. If you are not working, there is every temptation to languish in bed until lunchtime and maybe not dress properly for the day; avoid this. Make sure you get up at a set time and factor in some daily tasks to add an element of routine. Eat well because your diet is just as important as any other aspect of your lifestyle. It is fine to have the odd burger and chips here and there, but do not make it the norm; try to eat as you would if you were living your best life.

Exercise

Exercise is important, even if it is a run around the yard or a routine followed at home. Exercise produces positive endorphins that promote mental wellness, so you should feel better after a workout. Also, and this is crucial if you live alone, set up a buddy group. Make sure you have human interaction to discuss issues, or to distract yourself. Try to keep busy too; having a distraction from the constant flow of bad news is a good way to keep yourself well. Maybe binge on a box set, get into a new video game or try to redecorate a room or two. If you are kept busy and focused, you can avoid falling into your own anxiety and stress.

Finally, try to avoid the news as much as possible.

Keeping up with current affairs via the internet or friends is great, but watching frightening headlines all day long will only exasperate any worries you might have.

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